The previous week had gave me an insight on certain things in life, and how perhaps, with perseverance, indeed comes great results.
Being /this/ close to breaking down and giving up almost everything that I had, just because at that moment, I believed that I deserved better.
I spend 2 days thinking what exactly I wanted. Someone who was strong, powerful, but a little selfish, or someone who cares, but is emotionally weak and needy? I pondered, for 4 days, until I came up with a conclusion today.
I need someone who is strong, maybe a little selfish, but benevolence don't go anyway sometimes. And I know I can count on him. I am very glad I didn't do anything foolish in the days of being emotionally unstable, when everyone wanted a piece of me. I concluded it was because I needed someone there for me during that day, when the rising stress from the final report and presentation took a toll on me, and he happened to be the one.
But today, when I realised my decision at the first place was selfish. I was selfish, because I only thought of myself. I totally disregarded your feelings, the hardship you are going through, and thought I was the one having it worse. In the end, I suppose we are both equal.
I could apologize to him and his relationship too. Because my selfishness had almost caused another heartbreak. But I don't blame myself or regret anything, because I still think you deserve better. Better than her, better than me.
I am contented now. One cannot ask for more in life, because God gives us what he knows we can do. I am thankful.
Okay, look, if you just not fucking interested with your final year project, you are welcomed to just get out of the group. People gave you the deadline for a reason. Perhaps it's common sense you send in whatever you need to by the given deadline instead of sending an sms over and say how you forget to send it, WITHOUT A FUCKING APOLOGY. ffs, I can't clean up shit for you.
Singaporeans, you guys are a bloody disgrace.
It makes me want to kick you people in the head, especially when there are comments about how undeserving some ministers are. You think you people can do better? Perhaps they might have done wrong in the past, but do you think they deserved all these public bashing you are giving them? Do you think the opposition is perfect? Everyone makes mistakes, I dare say all of you complainy people has made mistakes before. What are you to judge them by their mistakes? They have done their part for the country. What the hell have all of you been doing?
Complain about National Service, complain about foreigners, complain about CPF, complain about public housing, complain about GST. National Service should be mandatory. It's not about the training, it's about fighting for the country we all grew up in, the country that have given us stability. Show some appreciation and stop grumbling. BE A MAN. MAN-UP DUDES.
Complain on foreigners. People, please. This is like the most over-rated topic EVER. Without these foreigners, who is going to build your houses and infrastructure? You counting on Singaporeans to stand under the hot sun to build those stuff? Go count the number of grass in China why don't you. It's never going to happen. Foreign talents. We talk about why some of us lose out, 'because of National Service'. Gosh please, if you are up to the job, no one can steal it from you. If you ain't so demanding, you WILL get the job.
CPF. I am only 18 years old, I am not working. I don't really know much about the CPF scheme, but I do know you can only take out the money at your sixties. People don't understand why they do that. So if you take out your money early, spend like money grows on trees, and in a few years time, you are out of money, and it struck you that money doesn't actually grow on trees, WHERE THE WORLD ARE YOU GOING TO FIND THE MONEY TO SUPPORT YOU UNTIL YOU KICK THE BUCKET? It's logical, no?
Public housing. I have got to admit. It's stupid how if the gross income of a family is SGD8,000, the couple cannot apply a HBD flat. Okay, our government seriously needs to look at that. This is just plain funny.
GST, okay, so GST shouldn't be charged on basic necessities because it's life and people needs to eat. But GST should be implemented on those 'wants', instead of 'needs' items. Gosh, if you are rich enough to buy your 'wants', of course you have no rudding problem paying for the GST.
You want to complain some more? There are so many people who are living in fear everyday, because of a unstable government, and insecurity. We should be grateful Singapore is doing its part to ensure the safety of us. Count your blessings people. There are people who wishes for just a country they can call home, instead of walking around in constant fear of being shot. And you people don't want to be Singaporean any more just because of such matters? Know your priorities.
And one more thing before I end this rant.
To all those haters of Tin Pei Ling, she might not be the best MP out there, but out of the million of Singaporeans that PAP would have chosen, they chose her. So apparently, you people are just not up to the standard of being an MP. She had yet to go into parliament and prove herself worthy, but that doesn't mean she isn't good. Give the lady a chance, let her show what she can do for our society. I admit, Nicole Seah is definitely a better speaker, but do you think her capability is better? can talk =/= can do.
To all those disgruntled citizens who are just butt-hurt that PAP as once again become the ruling government, they will be here to stay for the next 5 years. DEAL WITH IT.
This post is not meant to be pro-PAP or anything. And everything here is just my opinion. It's just frustrating how my facebook and twitter feed is cramped with so many blog posts containing comments that are so hurtful. Don't come up with the crap of, 'if you don't like then don't read la!' Puh-lease people. You think I bother reading? All I have to do is look at the title of the post, and my mind will instantly tell me, 'Crap written by crappy people about their crappy woes that are full of crap'. Seriously people, you think by writing such articles you are very heroic and your 'never ending woes' will be heard? You call them names, like you bloggers are of any better. The government are made up of people with emotions. They are not robots. Imagine how they feel if they read all your comments about them. Gosh, you guys are worse than scum. Because you allowed yourself to snoop to a level that your intelligence level can never comprehend (reads dumb). Grow up.
I am 18. I am not eligible to vote. But I got 2 questions, one to PAP, the other to WP.
To Prime Minister Mr Lee Hsien Loong, you ask Singaporeans if they wanted a less than best government. What is the best government?
To Workers' Party, your manifesto is to have a First World Parliament. Define First World Parliament?
I know no one is going to answer my questions. I will just watch the news.
Hello livejournal, my only place of endless rants about life.
Okay, with that sentence said, I don't even need to elaborate further about what I want to say.
YOU KNOW WHAT MISTER I-THINK-I-KNOW-EVERYTHING, YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING.
Don't call me immature. Look at yourself. You are nowhere better than I am.
Don't say that I don't listen to opinions. Because if I didn't, I wouldn't give a flying fuck about you and your life.
You think you are someone who knows a lot of things, someone that is very knowledgeable.
Let me give you MY OPINION. You know nothing. Your life is this screwed up because you are impulsive, and you don't even care about the thoughts of other people. You are just that insensitive and unappreciative.
I am not even angry because of your rants about the upcoming May 7 big day. Please, cut the people around you some slack. Do you think we want to know what the hell you think about the big G, much less your disagreements with their policies and what not? They consists of people. No one is perfect. Not even you. We don't live to please everyone. You want to disagree, we all know that. There are bound to be people who are disagreeable with some things that are being done in our country. But no one deserves your cursing and swearing at them. Do you think you can be half as good as them? I am telling you now, NO. I don't even need you to talk about running a country. Even something like friendship. You think by scolding me on Facebook you are getting yourself plus points to become "The World Best Friend"? I am telling you, keep on dreaming. Call me a fanatic. Look at yourself. Are you any better? No. All you ever done was to tell the world you hate the big G. Go join the forces that oppose them. I want to see how you are going to survive. I am not saying this because I am in favour of the G-es. I don't mind the other forces, because a little competition never hurts. But please, keep your comments to yourself.
I DON'T GIVE A FLYING FUCK IF YOU HATE ME NOW. YOU THINK I CARE? NO.
a few things today:
1. HAPPY 2ND YEAR ANNIVERSARY SJ-WORLD. Without this forum, I wouldn't have known the amazing people who resides there, and you people just make me don't want to get off this fandom. Breathing Room spam is always the best ♥
because this is too awesome to be missed. I am narcissistic like that. ;ghi;
2. I studied until I had a fever. Surprise! Even to myself, because that had never never happened in my 18 years of residing on Earth. I am beginning to think that I am really old now. /gets bricked
3. Someone on Twitter said something about Singapore being small because her friend is in a relationship with another friend of hers and she just found out today. Not to burst your bubble dear, but your another friend happens to be my boyfriend. And you know me, he knows you, you know him, I know you, but you don't know we are together. /gets thrown out of window
4. EXAMS ARE OVER TOMORROW I CAN'T WAIT TO GO TIMBRE WITH THE AWESOME PEOPLE I CALL CLASSMATES. \o/
I AM SO HAPPY IDE..
My translated transcript. :D on some website other than a sj-based one. ;mhm;
studying for WRT now. Pretty bored and all, rewriting all my notes.
tsk. It's all for the greater good. I want to go NTU, so must study hard! D:
boyfie called on Sunday, man, i miss him like crazy now. If i survive this period 10 days, I must be seriously proud of myself.
I am pretty thankful to all the people over at sjw. with the upcoming sjw 2nd Anniversary preps, it's something to keep me busy. :/
diving pool session on sunday. can't wait. breathing underwater sounds damn fun. AND I WANT TO GO CLUBBING. WHERE'S MY CLUBBING KAKIS. WHERE ARE YOU PRIS AND UNCLE CHING. D:
okay, back to studying. kbye.
I am so tired. I am just tired beyond myself.
Sometimes, I think I try too hard to be strong, weakness seem like I will have to look vulnerable.
I try so hard not to cry, and I just end up brawling.
It's not even funny.
I wonder if you think of me too.
Oh gosh. It's me being pathetic and hapless again.
I need to be stronger than that.
jcxf, come out quick..
Went out sister yesterday. Ranted about C and how he was being an ass.
And how he lost 2 of us as his friends before of his idiocy.
Sat around NEX eating dessert anddddddddd!
I told her about the truth reason why I broke up with that sonofabitch.
Come to think of it, she's probably the only one who knows. It's over. I am not seeing him in school.
But I dreamt about it last night. The slapping and all that.
Gosh. It scared the hell out of me.
I don't want to have anything to do with him. I am so scared of bumping into him.
And I don't have anyone to help me if I do. It crosses my mind that he might just run up and kill me when I am alone and he sees me. :/
I need to get over it.
Oh, scars of the past, you just know when to strike, especially when it is hot huh.
Please, I don't want to have anymore nightmares about that asswipe.
1 year of that shit was enough.
A normal day this week would to to wake up, grab breakfast, switch on the computer and start gossiping/spazzing/anything over the web.
But, in the other side of the world, Libya is not, of anything, normal. A dictator who has ordered a genocide and massacre of his people, it's just insane.
Whatever happened to equality of people? Don't everyone have a right to voice their opinions, much less an opinion on someone who is for more definitely in the wrong? What have these Libyans done to bring these upon themselves?
One's thirst for power is always at the expense of another, Gadhafi, a man who doesn't care what the world thinks of him, is abusing the power bestowed on him. To mercilessly kill ordinary people, what is there to gain from it? I don't know why, but all these just disgust me so badly. I don't even know how to rant on it, because I am just someone who is relying on news articles to view the situation on hand, and not some one who is physically there. I wonder how the Libyans are feeling, to have so much unrest in a place they call home.
A protest of rights, a group of people believing in a happier future, a bloody massacre by a dictator. It just doesn't make sense does it? But this is what Libya is going through now. Sitting behind the computer, reading articles after articles about this uprise, I am beginning to appreciate what I have. To be able to have electricity and communicate with anyone I like, to be able to walk out of my house at some unearthly hour in just t-shirt and shorts to eat and feel safe. These are the little things in life that we do, forever thinking that it will be there for us. But to others, it is not. Being unable to have access to internet and land lines, unable to communicate with anyone, even within the country, not wanting to go out of the house, in fear of being shot, and home might not be a safe haven for them now. It wouldn't make a difference for them, even if I would to write a length long of essay now, but that isn't the purpose why I am writing this. It is to raise awareness for these people, who are protesting for their own rights, their rights of freedom. Some of these protesters may be of the same age as us, perhaps even younger, but they are fighting for a better future, a future where they can be voice out their speech freely, and to do things that normal teenagers like us do. The sad truth is by each word I type here, someone there might have been injured, or worse, killed. This is up to us, to bring the situation to the attention of the respective people, to tell them what is going on in the world. You and I, we may be nothing compared to actors, actresses, celebrities.. but we have the freedom of speech, and let's exercise this, in hope of helping people, who deserve the same equality as us, to remind strong, and stand up to what is truly worth standing up for.
a week of madness, and it is just about to get worse.
I don't know what's wrong with me, but I don't even like it a single bit.
I swear, I am pretty certain the number of times I have burst out crying in the past month is more than that of the whole 2010.
I need a distraction. BADLY.